Introducing, Mr. Smith

Once I left my 25 year marriage, I felt like a failure.

“I don’t need no man”, was my tagline. That is what I told myself, but there is a difference between need, and want. I like men, and knew one day the right one would show up. At the time he didn’t look like what I envisioned, but that was just another thought process that needed letting go. God had proved multiple times that His plan is nothing like mine.

Time has passed, and I see that people come into my life for a reason, and sometimes only a season. Each person has made me better in some way. My hope would be that they are better for visiting, but that is up to them. A really good relationship is about so much more than love. This year I’ve learned patience.

It takes a butt ton of patience, and understanding.

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When I met Mr. Smith I told him, “You don’t have to worry about breaking my heart. I can do that myself!” More time has passed, and I know that he wouldn’t.

When I told him, “God gave me this title, Bentnotbroken,” Smith showed me a picture of his back. Tattooed from the top of his spine, all the way down, were the words, “Bent not broken.”

I just sat there in shock, and stared at the picture.

Had God given me a Blog/Book title, or a man?

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This I Know

When I was a little girl, we went to church. Mama was very active in the church, so the whole family went. Mama didn’t give us a choice until we were 18.

There was a song we sang in Sunday school, and you’ve probably heard it. “Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so.” We learned it by heart.

Mama made us go to church, so when I turned 18, I left. Who wants to be ‘made’, or forced to do something? I may have left the church, but Mama knew what she was doing. I still don’t question Gods love for me. His love is the one love I know is true.

When I look over my life, and ponder what has bent me the most, it’s relationships. I haven’t written in-depth about them publicly before, but writing heals.

I don’t write about specific people, or use any names. It’s what the person taught me that will fall to the page. If they read this Blog, and realize it is them being used as an example, my hope would be they feel honored for being worth writing about.

I want to document this season of my life, because I haven’t done that before. Most people keep private journals, which I have a stack of, but keeping it private doesn’t help anyone but me. This life is not all about me, and even that took time to know.

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This I know.

It’s a Start

New day. New Blog. New me. Same God.

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To come upon a door that is stunningly beautiful requires walking through all it’s predecessors. What’s behind each door will bend us, but God won’t let us break.

Every door is a new beginning. It holds a start, a middle, and an end. The ending depends on time, and how much is needed. We can let the door shut, or wedge something in there before it closes completely. Some will slam shut, but there are tools for that! A hammer, and nails can reinforce it, making it difficult to reopen, but a crowbar can pry it open.

Lay the crowbar aside, rest, and wait for a new door. They become prettier with time, and it will speak to your heart. What’s on the other side serves as practice for what’s next; growing us in strength, and character. Stay the full journey; being mindful, brave and present. Be grateful, and your heart will feel it start to close giving you time to exit gracefully.

A door opened in May 2014 to begin writing at https://letitgocoach.com/ In May 2015, this domain name was established, and you can see God’s timeline in the About section. The past 3 years of writing came from walking through doors, and they were nothing like this beautiful one pictured above.

Someone gave me this door. (The picture) Her name is Sarah, and she is a beautiful soul sister within my journey. She sent this picture via Facebook, and wrote, “Because this is stunning just like you!” She had no idea about this new Blog. Bent Not Broken beholds a beautiful, new door, and it’s exciting to ponder what inside. Hello first post! It’s a start…